Seriously, man, you and me, we're f#$&%(#* done professionally.

I believe the only proper way to react to an act of celebrity idiocy...

...is to make the celebrity look like an idiot.

I mean, seriously, this is the director of photography, not the best boy intern. YOU show some respect, Christian Bale. A childish rant is about as "fuckin' amateur" as it gets. Just because you can talk in a growly voice doesn't make you Batman. Also, Mc "I didn't see anything!" G, you can shut it too. I wonder if you're going to lie about the mood on this set in interviews, too?

I can only imagine Bryce Dallas Howard cracking up behind her hands.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go dance.

London blog

It's my first day on the blog, and my first post*. To celebrate, I am having a London Fog.


Not really. I am having a London Fog because it is finally a Starbucks "Cold Day" in Chicago. Which means a free Tazo Tea Beverage between 2 p.m. and 5 p.m. I have been hearing those stupid commercials all month. Was it worth delaying my lunch break just to save $3? Let me reply by way of a question.

Doesn't this tea bag look like a little pillow?

Yes. Yes it does.

*excluding repurposed myspace blogs, of course.

Another Disney sex scene scandal

So the other day I was watching The Cat from Outer Space and i was shocked -- shocked! -- to discover that this seemingly wholesome family film about an intergalactic cat with a gambling problem contains illicit sexual innuendo. It's even worse than that time the priest in The Little Mermaid got a boner.

Just watch this. It helps if you close your eyes.



I can't believe they just slapped in some porno audio and called it a day. I'd write a letter to complain, but the movie won we over with this moment:



Awesome indeed.